To Save the American Family, Lawmakers Need to Target Biased and Ill-Conceived Domestic Violence Policies

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Rebecca Stewart: 513-479-3335

To Save the American Family, Lawmakers Need to Target Biased and Ill-Conceived Domestic Violence Policies

“When the family collapses, it is the children that are usually damaged. When it happens on a massive scale, the community itself is crippled.” — President Lyndon B. Johnson (1)

WASHINGTON / February 1, 2022 – Commentators are expressing growing alarm over declining marriage rates in the United States, even speculating on the possibility of an imminent “end” of the institution. (2). The Coalition to End Domestic Violence calls on lawmakers to reform domestic violence policies in order to revive and strengthen the institution of marriage.

In 1949, 78.8% of all American households contained married couples. While marriage rates began to deteriorate around 1960, passage of the federal Violence Against Women Act in 1994 served to solidify the marital decline. By 2020, only 48.2% of households had married couples (3).

In particular, observers have lamented the growing problem of fatherlessness, which has many causes. Father absence is associated with a broad range of negative outcomes for youth at all stages of development (4).

During Black History Month, we need to reflect how these trends are especially acute among Black families, who struggle to overcome the enduring legacies of racial discrimination and poverty. In the inner city, the traditional Black family essentially has ceased to exist (5).

Domestic violence policies are a major contributor to the problems of family dissolution and fatherlessness, for four reasons:

Vilification of Men: Each year there are 4.2 million male victims of domestic violence, compared to 3.5 million female victims, according to the CDC (6). But domestic education awareness programs falsely portray men as abusers and women as victims. These bogus stereotypes instill mistrust and fear in women, and serve to weaken respectful and loving relationships between the sexes.
Mandatory Arrest: Many states have policies that mandate arrest, even for cases of minor abuse. These policies in turn drive the use of biased “predominant aggressor” policies that rely on criteria such as the size and strength of the parties. As a result, four out of five persons arrested for domestic violence are male (7).
Restraining Orders: Many states allow judges to issue restraining orders based solely on an accusation. These states often rely on overly broad definitions of domestic violence that are nearly impossible to refute, such as “fear,” “emotional distress,” and even “apprehension” (8). If the couple is undergoing a divorce, the existence of a restraining order can unfairly interfere with a father’s ability to be fully involved in the lives of his children.
Couples Counseling: Most domestic violence incidents are one-time and/or minor. But many states actually prohibit couples counseling in the event of a domestic violence allegation. Such policies should be changed when the therapist believes the situation is safe and both parties want to attend.

The negative stereotyping of men and the exponential growth in mandatory arrest and enforcement of restraining orders are direct outgrowths of the federal Violence Against Women Act.

The Coalition to End Domestic Violence has developed a range of recommendations to reform abuse policies (9). Lawmakers should work to end the false stereotyping of men, ban mandatory arrest and predominant aggressor policies, end the over-use of restraining orders, and allow couples counseling as appropriate.

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